8 Ways to Write Unique Wedding Vows

As a wedding vow expert, I’ve written a lot of posts about how to write vows like funny vows, tear-inspiring vows, and non-religious vows.

But as you ring in the new year, you may be ready to throw out the old and embrace the new, and so you’ll want to consider writing unique wedding vows.

Reference my easy-to-follow guide so you can begin to write unique wedding vows. 

Tip #1: Change Up the Vow Structure

Have you ever heard the saying, “You need to first learn the rules before you can break them?”

Well, here are the “rules” that I typically recommend for a vow writing outline:

  1. Set the scene

  2. List qualities you love about your partner

  3. Detail why you admire your relationship

  4. Communicate specific promises

  5. Describe your future marriage

  6. Close with a loving last line

Now that you know the key components to a vow writing outline, consider how you may “break these rules” in order to write unique wedding vows.

Perhaps you want to include all of these sections but in a different order. Maybe you’d prefer to leave out the additional words of affirmation and simply focus on describing your future marriage.

Consider the typical vow writing outline, and reflect on what works for you and what you don’t like. Then, write vows based on that vision. 

Tip #2: Try Writing Very Short Vows

Most couples I work with recite vows that are between two to five minutes.

Even couples who start out saying that want very short wedding vows, end up with vows that are closer to two or three minutes once they realize how much they want to communicate and how the time quickly adds up when reciting each loving detail.

But, if you want truly unique wedding vows, aim to write vows that are less than 60 seconds. Vows this short are not common and can have an immense impact.

Here are the benefits of writing short wedding vows:

  • Short vows fit seamlessly into any style of a wedding ceremony. Whether you’re planning a traditional religious ceremony or a shorter elopement ceremony, short vows will keep the entire ceremony flowing and won’t disrupt your timeline for the day. 

  • Short vows have a strong emotional impact. It can actually be much more challenging to write shorter vows but if you can master this task, the results will be felt by your future spouse.

  • Short vows keep the attention of your guests. We’ve all been to that wedding where the couple’s vows went on for so long, it was hard to pay attention. With shorter vows, your guests will actually listen to every word you have to say. 

Tip #3: Write Your Vows Like a Poem

To write unique wedding vows, consider different delivery formats. For example, writing your vows in the format of a poem is a special way to shake up the typical vow delivery.

Here are some poem styles for you to consider:

  • Haiku

  • Sonnet

  • Acrostic

  • Limerick

  • Lyric

Tip #4: Focus on the Promises

As I mentioned earlier, most vows I write include several features such as detailing why you love your partner, your vision for marriage, and your relationship style.

While these are all nice things to add to your vows, they are not must-haves.

All wedding vows need to really be considered vows are the promises you make to your partner. 

So for a unique twist on writing vows, consider only including the promises section. 

Example: 

Isabella,

I promise to show up for you in times of joy and bouts of sorrow.

I promise to always see you as the courageous, thoughtful, and kind person you are.

I promise to cook us breakfast for dinner every Friday and to always have chapstick on hand for you to use.

And most of all, I promise to be a loving best friend, teammate, and spouse for the rest of my days.

Tip #5: Work with a Professional Vow Writer

While it’s becoming more well-known, working with a professional wedding vow writer is still considered a unique approach to vow writing.

As a vow writer, I work with couples who know what they want to say…they just don’t know how to articulate those thoughts and feelings into unique wedding vows.

Get in touch to see how we can best put your heart into words through my custom vow writing service.

Tip #6: Share Your Vows in Private

It may be mainstream to recite personalized wedding vows during the wedding ceremony but a unique approach is with private wedding vows.

Private wedding vows are when just you and your partner exchange vows in an exclusive setting. Guests aren’t present but your photographer and videographer may be there to capture the moment. 

This is especially great for couples who have a public speaking fear or who want the moment to feel more intimate. 

Tip #7: Write Two Different Sets of Vows

Most couples write one draft of their wedding vows but for more unique vows, write two different drafts.  

Just like many brides opt to wear one style of dress to the ceremony and another style to the reception, the tone of your vows can change depending on where you recite them and who you say them in front of.

For example, you may want to write one style of vows to read publicly during your ceremony and a different set to read privately during your first look.

Or perhaps you’re having two wedding ceremonies: one with all of your family and friends and another where you and your spouse elope. 

In this case, change up the wording to reflect the situation. 

Tip #8: Surprise your Fiance with Your Unique Wedding Vows 

Who says you both have to recite wedding vows? 

A unique direction is to surprise your new spouse by reciting all the reasons why you love and appreciate them. 

If your partner’s love language is words of affirmation, this romantic gesture could be the perfect way to show your love for them on your wedding day.

Testimonials

Love my vows Katelyn!!!! It’s such a relief to have this out of the way so I can focus on all the rest of the stuff I need to do! 

You were my very favorite part of the process!! Your experience and confidence in the process took all the stress out of writing my vows!

— Natalie, Florida

I thought the process was outstanding. You did a great job communicating, and I thought the turnaround time for editing was perfect. I also thought the video interview was great in that it was personal and meaningful!

— Jordan

I am a storyteller, not a speechwriter. I was incredibly intimidated about writing one.

So thankful to find Katelyn to get my thoughts all in order. Very proud of how the speech came out. Looking forward to giving it!

— Jennifer Whitley, Texas

I had such a wonderful experience working with Katelyn. She truly helped mold perfect vows that I can’t wait to tell my fiancé on our wedding day! 

Katelyn was friendly, sweet, and super easy to work with. I will definitely be calling her up if I have to give another speech in the near future.

— Jordanne, California

Katelyn was professional, easy to talk to, and made the interviewing process fun. She came well prepared with unexpected and thought-provoking questions to get a better understanding of our love story and who we are as a couple.

She was a pleasure to work with and made the vow writing process enjoyable.

— Kimi Kinsey, South Carolina

Working with Katelyn on my maid of honor toast was an incredible experience. She really took the time to understand my relationship with my best friend and used my responses to craft a toast that put my thoughts and feelings into words in a way that I never would have been able to do on my own.

Before working with Katelyn, I was nervous and stressed about giving (and writing) such a big, important speech. But now I’m so relieved that it’s done, and I honestly can’t wait to stand up and tell everyone exactly what my best friend means to me.

— Allyssa, New Jersey

I didn’t actually know this service existed until I discovered Katelyn! It was such a fun experience to video chat with her about my best friend who is getting married this summer.

I don’t have to stress about writing this a few weeks before my best friend’s wedding. Thank you so much and I can’t wait to read it at my best friend’s wedding!

— Gabby